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I can neither confirm, nor deny…
1793 AWESOME
206 WTW
60 BORING
this is how many sides a circle has
even einstein’s marriage was relative. It consumed his life
you know that you know you’ve seen that actor before
It all sounds awful until you remember that statistically flying is still the safest form of travel
who pooped the bed? sounds like an it’s always sunny in philadelphia episode
how to beat someone at chess when you’ve never played before
no serial killer, ted bundy included, could match wits with me if i really applied by myself instead of binging on oreos
i was without a phone once for 12 hours and it’s amazing how much attention i was able to pay to other things
jesus was larger than a baby but smaller than a temple. good to know!
toast and butter is an everyday phase
i have such fond memories of funnel milk
the real reason millennials aren’t buying diamonds. Has nothing to do with ethics or morals
Best responses to tweet about “mystery flight”
you’re not fooling anyone nasa!
there is no way the ice cream man didn’t see this person
When was the last time you had a carrot?
Still fighting with the wife?
Are you cold?
Sup?
Join the conversation
*snarl*
Thank goodness you’re home
Typical Monday
….but Einstein said
My period is a day late!
5 Phrases That Make My Blood Run Colder Than Ice
A Bad Lip Reading of Catching Fire
When Bill Nye started wearing bow ties.
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