The real hero doesn’t even have a username

Two pounds of pure, unadulterated cookie dough flavor

Four thousand dollars well spent right there

Goodbye responsibilities, hello sweet, sweet memory foam

Moving the laundry pile to a larger room

Neither of us has seen sunlight since Tuesday

My storage is full, but my heart is fuller

The majestic orange forest

Is there a gift shop at the top?

My love for Strawberry Kiwi knows no bounds

Everything is a metaphor if you’re bored enough

Autocorrect is the ultimate backseat driver

Celery is somewhere crying in a corner

My cat is going to explode

“Get in, loser, we’re going to the vet”

previous page button

next page button