Feeling Lucky?

The Object – A Short Story

even pirates dug for their treasure
even pirates dug for their treasure
i hope they’re proud of me
i hope they’re proud of me
after a day of clowning around
after a day of clowning around
as long as I can steal their fries…
as long as I can steal their fries…
when I was 21 I was broke and still in college
when I was 21 I was broke and still in college
no amount of preparation would have made me freddy for this
no amount of preparation would have made me freddy for this
they don’t make them like they used to
they don’t make them like they used to
this always mildly pleases me
this always mildly pleases me
add in that crazy-sounding nervous laughter, too
add in that crazy-sounding nervous laughter, too
a wholesome troll
a wholesome troll
words carry a lot of coding…
words carry a lot of coding…
sometimes you have to be lazy
sometimes you have to be lazy
is there a free option?
is there a free option?
the most secure network on the planet
the most secure network on the planet
idk but an “anxiety burrito” sounds good
idk but an “anxiety burrito” sounds good
THE+DIET+STARTS+TOMORROW
THE DIET STARTS TOMORROW
Was+the+present+the+mat%3F
Was the present the mat?
SHE+HAS+A+BRIGHT+FUTURE+IN+POLITICS
SHE HAS A BRIGHT FUTURE IN POLITICS
Do+you+think+this+is+funny%2C+AAPL%3F
Do you think this is funny, AAPL?
Join the conversation
NOT+TODAY%2C+MR.+WHISKERS
NOT TODAY, MR. WHISKERS
left+swipe
left swipe
CLOSE+ENOUGH%3F
CLOSE ENOUGH?
a+billion+dollar+idea
a billion dollar idea
Ladies+and+gentlemen%2C+the+luckiest+man+alive
Ladies and gentlemen, the luckiest man alive
At+least+you%26%238217%3Bre+familiar+with+the+metric+system.
At least you’re familiar with the metric system.
WHEN+YOU+GET+LOW+SELF+ESTEEM%2C+THINK+ABOUT+PIGEONS
WHEN YOU GET LOW SELF ESTEEM, THINK ABOUT PIGEONS
cats+know+good+music+when+they+hear+it
cats know good music when they hear it