My small talk usually goes like this

My small talk usually goes like this

there’s no way they didn’t get married

there’s no way they didn’t get married

I will murder you, sharon

I will murder you, sharon

i dare your heart not to melt

i dare your heart not to melt

this sounds amazing

this sounds amazing

i’m just gonna stay in bed all day Friday

i’m just gonna stay in bed all day Friday

undeniable logic

undeniable logic

is this a salad or not?

is this a salad or not?

im a total potat-hoe

im a total potat-hoe

get it, nate!

how… does this even happen?

how… does this even happen?

never has this felt more relevant than this year

never has this felt more relevant than this year

yes and yes

that’s gonna be a big mess to clean up

that’s gonna be a big mess to clean up

lol, what?

*emails office manager*

*emails office manager*