instant relief

send dudes, not nudes

beer science

classic carrie bradshaw

Figs are pollinated by wasps. after pollination, figs ‘digest’ the dead left dead inside. knowing this, i still plan to eat fig newtons. they are delicious

yes, please

this flesh prison won’t hold me for long

what every kid wants for christmas

such a misunderstood creature

i need to read this essay more than i’ve ever needed anything in my life

spitting venom

i move left, they move left. i move right, they move right

i should have texted instead

how is this not already a thing???

when you hold it to your ear you can hear the grapes crying

how it started vs how it’s going