you had a good run

your secret is unfortunately safe with me

what would be your first question to our new alien overlords?

gonna need to step outside for a second

dinner and show

popsicles

i can never show my face in public again

what other movies would be impossible to explain to kids today?

gonna move into a cave and start a new life

walmart would never have such an organized checkout line

so warm and cozy

life is like a box of jalapeno chocolates

when it comes to opening the produce bag we’re all equals

when you get so drunk you turn into joe rogan you KNOW it’s time to go home

if you’re a punctual person, now you know what your friends really mean they text you their eta

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