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daddy daughter bonding
1526 AWESOME
80 WTW
71 BORING
when you find out people prefer gin to whiskey…
don’t try calling the pawlice. there’s nothing you can do about it
peekaboo for adults
there is no better way to fill the void of existence than with a crunchwrap supreme from taco bell
70 year old grandma at rolling stones concert proves you’re never too old to rock
did you know e.t. had a last name?
Remember when Adam Scott revealed mark hammill never showed up to his childhood birthday part?
that awkward moment you make unavoidable eye-contact with a complete stranger
a real puffin trying to mimic and fit in with a fake puffin on the east coast
how you react to stepping on your pet vs how they react to stepping on you
use a second towel to avoid getting butt on your face
mario is a hero for doing the same thing that makes shredder a villain. Make it make sense
it turns out bart and lisa simpson were both bald
luigi is the queen in mario chess because he’s the nicest character and you always have to protect the nicest
CSI: disneyland
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What 60 feet of snow looks like.
I was that kid…
You just can’t know.
Things I say while driving
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Be reckless with toasters.
50 Shades of Hay
Oh, the Special Olympics?
I need to go potty
When I like a girl
Words
I’ve been doing my nails all wrong!
This was in my writing coaches office.
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